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HENRY LOUIS MENCKEN
American journalist and literary critic
(1880 - 1956)
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A fool who, after plain warning, persists in dosing himself with dangerous drugs should be free to do so, for his death is a benefit to the race in general.
      - [Drugs]

A good politician . . . is quite as unthinkable as an honest burglar.
      - [Politicians]

A great literature is chiefly the product of inquiring minds in revolt against the immovable certainties of the nation.
      - [Literature]

A great nation is any mob of people which produces at least one honest man a century.
      - [Nation]

A judge is a law student who marks his own examination papers.
      - [Judges]

A large part of altruism, even when it is perfectly honest, is grounded upon the fact that it is uncomfortable to have unhappy people about one.
      - [Charity]

A man is called a good fellow for doing things which, if done by a woman, would land her in a lunatic asylum.
      - [Men]

A man loses his sense of direction after four drinks; a woman loses hers after four kisses.
      - [Drinking]

A man who is an agnostic by inheritance, so that he doesn't remember any time that he wasn't, has almost no hatred for the religious.
      - [Agnosticism]

A metaphysician is one who, when you remark that twice two makes four, demands to know what you mean by twice, what you mean by two, what by makes, and what by four.
      - [Metaphysics]

A newspaper is a device for making the ignorant more ignorant and the crazy crazier.
      - [Newspapers]

A poet more than thirty years old is simply an overgrown child.
      - [Poets]

A professor must have a theory as a dog must have fleas.
      - [Teachers]

Adultery is the application of democracy to love.
      - [Adultery]

After all, the world is not our handiwork, and we are not responsible for what goes on in it, save within very narrow limits.
      - [Responsibility]

All talk of winning the people by appealing to their intelligence, of conquering them by impeccable syllogism, is so much moonshine.
      - [Influence]

An absolutely new idea is one of the rarest things known to man.
      - [Novelty]

As the arteries grow hard, the heart grows soft.
      - [Aging]

Bachelors have consciences, married men have wives.
      - [Bachelors]

Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't, they'd be married too.
      - [Bachelors]

Change is not progress.
      - [Change]

Christian theology is not only opposed to the scientific spirit; it is opposed to every other form of rational thinking.
      - [Christianity]

Communism, like any other revealed religion, is largely made up of prophecies.
      - [Communism]

Complete masculinity and stupidity are often indistinguishable.
      - [Men]

Conscience is the inner voice that warns us somebody may be looking.
      - [Conscience]


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