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English wit and poet
(1612 - 1680)
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For zeal's a dreadful termagant,
  That teaches saints to tear and cant.
      - Hudibras (pt. III, canto II, l. 673)

So 'ere the storm of war broke out,
  Religion spawn'd a various rout
    Of petulant capricious sects,
      That maggots of corrupted texts,
        That first run all religion down,
          And after every swarm its own.
      - Hudibras (pt. III, canto II, l. 7)

Sure 'tis an orthodox opinion,
  That grace is founded in dominion.
      - Hudibras (pt. III, canto III, l. 1,173)

For those that fly may fight again,
  Which he can never do that's slain.
      - Hudibras (pt. III, canto III, l. 243)

He that complies against his will,
  Is of his own opinion still,
    Which he may adhere to, yet disown,
      For reasons to himself best known.
      - Hudibras (pt. III, canto III, l. 547)

With books and money placed, for show
  Like nest eggs, to make clients lay,
    And for his false opinion pay.
      - Hudibras (pt. III, canto III, l. 624)

His fear was greater than his haste:
  For fear, though fleeter than the wind,
    Believes 'tis always left behind.
      - Hudibras (pt. III, canto III, l. 64)

Unconscious humor.
      - Life and Habit [Humor]

And poets by their sufferings grow,--
  As if there were no more to do,
    To make a poet excellent,
      But only want and discontent.
      - Miscellaneous Thoughts [Poets]

The souls of women are so small,
  That some believe they've none at all;
    Or if they have, like cripples, still
      They've but one faculty, the will.
      - Miscellaneous Thoughts [Women]

More proselytes and converts use t' accrue
  To false persuasions than the right and true;
    For error and mistake are infinite,
      But truth has but one way to be i' th' right.
      - Miscellaneous Thoughts (l. 113) [Truth]

Nothing's more dull and negligent
  Than an old, lazy government,
    That knows no interest of state,
      But such as serves a present strait.
      - Miscellaneous Thoughts (l. 159)

The worst of rebels never arm
  To do their king or country harm,
    But draw their swords to do them good,
      As doctors cure by letting blood.
      - Miscellaneous Thoughts (l. 181)

Authority intoxicates,
  And makes mere sots of magistrates;
    The fumes of it invade the brain,
      And make men giddy, proud, and vain.
      - Miscellaneous Thoughts (l. 283)

Butler's Law of Progress: All progress is based on a universal innate desire on the part of every organism to live beyond its income.
      - Note-Books [Laws of Life and Nature]

For trouts are tickled best in muddy water.
      - On a Hypocritical Nonconformist (st. 4)

For blocks are better cleft with wedges,
  Tan tools of sharp or subtle edges,
    And dullest nonsense has been found
      By some to be the most profound.
      - Pindaric Ode (IV, l. 82) [Nonsense]

For though to smatter ends of Greek
  Or Latin be the rhetoric
    Of pedants counted, and vain-glorious,
      To smatter French is meritorious.
      - Remains in Verse and Prose--Satire--Upon Our Ridiculous Imitation of the French
         (line 127),
        a Greek proverb condemns the man of two tongues

So Noah, when he anchor'd safe on
  The mountain's top, his lofty haven,
    And all the passengers he bore
      Were on the new world set ashore,
        He made it next his chief design
          To plant and propagate a vine,
            Which since has overwhelm'd and drown'd
              Far greater number, on dry ground,
                Of wretched mankind, one by one,
                  Than all the flood before had done.
      - Satire Upon Drunkenness (l. 105)
        [Wine and Spirits]

Bloody wars at first began,
  The artificial plague of man,
    That from his own invention rise,
      To scourge his own iniquities.
      - Satire--Upon the Weakness and Misery of Man
         (l. 105) [War]

Whatever I can say or do.
  I'm sure not much avails;
    I shall still Vicar be of Bray,
      Whichever side prevails.
      - Tale of the Cobbler and the Vicar of Bray,
        in posthumous works [Royalty]

He who does not make his words rather serve to conceal than discover the sense of his heart deserves to have it pulled out like a traitor's and shown publicly to the rabble.
      - The Modern Politician [Speech]

I dare be bold, you're one of those
  Have took the covenant,
    With cavaliers are cavaliers
      And with the saints, a saint.
      - The Tale of the Cobbler and the Vicar of Bray

I loved no King since Forty One
  When Prelacy went down,
    A Cloak and Band I then put on,
      And preached against the Crown.
      - The Turn-Coat, in posthumous works

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