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Irish satirist and man of letters
(1667 - 1745)
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Hail, fellow, well met,
  All dirty and wet:
    Find out, if you can,
      Who's master, who's man.
      - My Lady's Lamentation
        [Investigation : Proverbial Phrases]

The artillery of words.
      - Ode to Sancroft (l. 13) [Words]

War, that mad game the world so loves to play.
      - Ode to Sir Wm. Temple [War]

Virtue, the greatest of all monarchies.
      - Ode--To the Hon. Sir William Temple

I'm up and down and round about,
  Yet all the world can't find me out;
    Though hundreds have employed their leisure,
      They never yet could find my measure.
      - On a Circle [Circles]

Those dreams, that on the silent night intrude,
  And with false flitting shades our minds delude,
    Jove never sends us downward from the skies;
      Nor can they from infernal mansions rise;
        But are all mere productions of the brain,
          And fools consult interpreters in vain.
      - On Dreams [Dreams]

A forward critic often dupes us
  With sham quotations peri hupsos.
    And if we have not read Longinus,
      Will magisterially outshine us.
        Then, lest with Greek he over-run ye,
          Procure the book for love or money,
            Translated from Boileau's translation,
              And quote quotation on quotation.
      - On Poetry [Quotations]

Then, rising with Aurora's light,
  The Muse invoked, sit down to write;
    Blot out, correct, insert, refine,
      Enlarge, diminish, interline.
      - On Poetry [Poets]

For, poems read without a name,
  We justly praise, or justly blame;
    And critics have no partial views,
      Except they know whom they abuse.
        And since you ne'er provoke their spite,
          Depend upon't their judgment's right.
      - On Poetry (l. 129) [Criticism]

A prince, the moment he is crown'd,
  Inherits every virtue sound,
    As emblems of the sovereign power,
      Like other baubles in the Tower:
        Is generous, valiant, just, and wise,
          And so continues till he dies.
      - On Poetry (l. 191) [Royalty]

In all distresses of our friends
  We first consult our private ends;
    While Nature, kindly bent to ease us,
      Points out some circumstance to please us.
      - On the Death of Dr. Swift,
        a paraphrase of Rochefoucauld's "Maxim"

I with borrow'd silver shine,
  What you see is none of mine.
    First I show you but a quarter,
      Like the bow that guards the Tartar:
        Then the half, and then the whole,
          Ever dancing round the pole.
      - On the Moon [Moon]

Ever eating, never cloying,
  All devouring, all-destroying,
    Never finding full repast,
      Till I eat the world at last.
      - On Time [Time]

Walls have tongues, and hedges ears.
      - Pastoral Dialogue (l. 7) [Proverbs]

Where Young must torture his invention
  To flatter knaves, or lose his pension.
      - Poetry, a Rhapsody (l. 279) [Flattery]

Hobbes clearly proves that every creature
  Lives in a state of war by nature.
      - Poetry--A Rhapsody [War]

So, naturalists observe, a flea
  Has smaller fleas that on him prey;
    And these have smaller still to bite 'em,
      And so proceed ad infinitum.
        Thus every poet in his kind
          Is bit by him that comes behind.
      - Poetry--A Rhapsody [Fleas]

Do you think I was born in a wood to be afraid of an owl?
      - Polite Conversation (dialogue I) [Fear]

I mean you lie--under a mistake.
      - Polite Conversation (dialogue I) [Lying]

I swear she's no chicken; she's on the wrong side of thirty, if she be a day.
      - Polite Conversation (dialogue I) [Age]

I won't quarrel with my bread and butter.
      - Polite Conversation (dialogue I)

She looks as if butter wouldn't melt in her mouth.
      - Polite Conversation (dialogue I)

She wears her clothes as if they were thrown on her with a pitchfork.
      - Polite Conversation (dialogue I) [Apparel]

The sight of you is good for sore eyes.
      - Polite Conversation (dialogue I) [Eyes]

What religion is he of?
  Why, he is an Anythingarian.
      - Polite Conversation (dialogue I)

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